Harold Roffey Author

Fiction and nonfiction contain truths about who we are, how we behave, how we think and what emotions are stirred within us.

Books | Short Stories | Social Commentary

I Left My Soul In Mozambique

‘And what are you staring at?’
‘You, Amanda, just you.’
Peter had been watching Amanda walking towards the rock on which he was sitting in the shade of a palm tree. He’d got out of the sea 10 minutes before and had carried their diving equipment to a dry area while she had her last swim of the day.
He’d had a true heart-melting experience when she’d agreed to stay for a further week to be with him. They’d met as part of a group attending the wedding of a mutual friend. She with her girl friends and he with his mates; neither had ever been to Mozambique, let alone the island of Benguerra.
That first day, while still wearing their London clothes, they’d hovered by the water’s edge in rolled-up slacks and tucked up skirt clutching their bags and shoes while a small launch nosed onto the sand. It wasn’t a coincidence that they’d both hung back and let others take the first of the trips from Vilanculos to the island.
‘You’re embarrassing me.’
‘I can’t help it. I could sit and watch you forever. I’ve not felt like this before.’
‘That’s because you’re daft. Let’s get showered and go and have a drink before dinner.’
Amanda shouldered her diving gear and they made their way along the path between sand dune bushes to their private cottage among the trees where they dumped their gear, rinsed their feet in a large ceramic bowl before walking over the towelled floor to the bathroom.
Wrapped in fresh dry towels, Amanda and Peter lay on the bed and watched two giant geckos fighting for the best position for the early evening insects above the corner lamp. They then reached for each other and made love for the second time that day. Lust didn’t feature; Peter confessed he wanted to own all of Amanda as he pushed himself up to look at her face while her head rested deep in the white pillow, and rather than answer, Amanda closed her eyes and pulled Peter’s head into her neck and gathered him up inside her as far as she could. They reached orgasm simultaneously, rolled onto their sides and looked at each other while remaining together and cried. A first for both.
Each had a growing need to plan for a future beyond the holiday, but the anxiety of breaking the spell of the moment loomed larger as time passed.
‘Tomorrow is our last full day and I’m going snorkelling first thing in the morning,’ Amanda told Peter before they drifted off to sleep. ‘I won’t wake you.’
Peter woke at 7 o’clock, remembered Amanda mentioning her early morning swim and lay tormented by thoughts of not being with her when the holiday was over. Only after a cold shower did he manage to construct what he thought would be a practical arrangement for them to be together, and with his spirits uplifted, he went to the bathroom and was part way through brushing his teeth, when he noticed the glass shelf above the basin was empty of all Amanda’s things. He quickly rinsed his mouth out without finishing and returned to the bedroom feeling nauseous. By the time he’d pulled the third draw open and found nothing of Amanda’s, he was shaking. He could feel his heart pounding and there was a ringing in his ears.
He was about to rush through the rear entrance of the cottage and onto the boardwalk through the trees to the main part of the hotel when he saw an envelope on the floor with his name on it.
My one and only love, Peter.
By the time you read this I will have caught the 4 am cargo boat in time for the 5:30 Sky Shuttle to Swaziland and beyond.
I fully believe you have given me the richest gifts ever. You gave me your body and soul completely. I have given you my body and soul with absolutely no reservations or regrets whatsoever.
I hope in my selfishness I have left your soul in good order and available for another time and another woman who will love you as I have done.
I want you to remember me as I have been to you these last few days. I also believe you love me to the extent whereby you would follow me regardless of the consequences. I only have a few more months to live and to think of you watching me deteriorate is something I cannot bear to even think about. However, to lessen this terrible blow I’ve given you, I’ve passed all your details to my father for him to keep you informed. But please go no further than that, for my sake.
You only have one life and now live it to the full and have no regrets.
Totally yours
Amanda

H E Roffey